Home → Day-to-Day Matters → Talking to Your Family and Friends About Breast Cancer → Ask-the-Expert Conferences: Family, Friends, Relationships → September 2004: Family and Loved Ones → Advice to get sex life back with wife?

Advice to get sex life back with wife?

Page last modified on: September 24, 2008

Question from John B: I really want to support my wife and share the same intimacy we had before. But our sex life has pretty much disappeared, and I don't know how to get it back. Any advice?: Answers —Marc Silver, author: I think romantic gestures are a way to try to begin connecting again. Think of the way you wooed her. Set up a date, and don't expect everything to happen at once. Sometimes just a good cuddle or hug can be a start to intimacy. See the section in my book on sex toys with information from Marisa Weiss.; Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W.: In the support group at our hospital, the women all talk about having a very diminished sexual interest. They're overwhelmed with the demands of treatment, worries about side effects, worries about the future, and the needs of children. Somehow sexual intimacy falls by the wayside. With the end of treatment and the entry into a new, normal life, most are looking forward to reestablishing intimacy, but slowly and gradually. So gestures of care and romance, as Marc suggests, are always welcome and helpful.; Marisa Weiss, M.D., president and founder: Without the pressure.; Marc Silver, author: My wife has some advice that I share in the book. If you want sex but your wife doesn't, too bad for you.

On Wednesday, September 15, 2004, our Ask-the-Expert Online Conference was called Family and Loved Ones. Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W., author Marc Silver, and moderator Marisa Weiss, M.D. answered your questions about the issues surrounding family members and caregivers living with and caring for women affected by breast cancer.

The materials presented in these conferences do not necessarily reflect the views of breastcancer.org. A qualified healthcare professional should be consulted before using any therapeutic product or regimen discussed. All readers should verify all information and data before employing any therapies described here.

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Meet the Experts

Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. is administrative supervisor for psychosocial programs at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center's Lauder Breast Center in New York City, where she leads weekly support groups for women with early and advanced breast cancer.

Marc Silver is the author of Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (And Yourself) Through Diagnosis, Treatment, and Beyond.

Marisa Weiss, M.D. is a radiation oncologist specializing in breast cancer and the founder, president, and guiding force behind Breastcancer.org.