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Okay to show fear around friend?

Page last modified on: October 16, 2008
Question from BDT: Is it better for the person to know how frightened I am? Or should I hide my fear?
Answer —Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W.: At the very beginning, your friend is much too vulnerable to be able to tolerate anyone else's fear. The patient's own fear is too intense and she needs to feel that she has strong people to lean on. You can confirm for her that it's understandable that she is frightened, that most people would be. But together, you'll get through this.

On Wednesday, February 21, 2007, our Ask-the-Expert Online Conference was called Partners, Loved Ones, Caregivers: Taking Care of  You. Author Marc Silver and moderator Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. answered your questions about how you can take care of your loved one and yourself during and after breast cancer treatment.


The materials presented in these conferences do not necessarily reflect the views of Breastcancer.org. A qualified healthcare professional should be consulted before using any therapeutic product or regimen discussed. All readers should verify all information and data before employing any therapies described here.

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Meet the Experts

Marc SilverMarc Silver is the author of Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (And Yourself) Through Diagnosis, Treatment, and Beyond.

Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W.Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. is administrative supervisor for psychosocial programs at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center's Lauder Breast Center in New York City, where she leads weekly support groups for women with early and advanced breast cancer.

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