Home → Day-to-Day Matters → Talking to Your Family and Friends About Breast Cancer → Ask-the-Expert Conferences: Family, Friends, Relationships → February 2007: Partners, Loved Ones, Caregivers: Taking Care of You → Good idea to gather all promising news for sister?

Good idea to gather all promising news for sister?

Page last modified on: October 16, 2008

Question from Argus: I've become the official gatherer of facts and information about treatments for my sister, but I hate to get her hopes up every time something promising hits the headlines. How do I filter information so it's helpful, without being too scary or overly optimistic? Or should I filter at all?: Answers —Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W.: The first thing to do is to try to get a clear indication of what your sister wants. Does she want all of the information? Does she want you to filter it? Does she only want to hear the optimistic? The only way to know how to handle this is to ask her what she needs.

It is also best, where possible, to rely upon information provided by your healthcare team. It is your physician who will know what is possible for you, what is realistic, and what is in your best interest. You may also want to ask your doctor if he or she believes that it is in your best interest to seek a second opinion at another center. In the best cases, it'll be your physician who will help organize the information that's important for you. Information that is out there on the Internet is too vast and confusing for the average patient and their family.; Marc Silver, author: This is a situation that many husbands face as well. Men sometimes feel it's their job to go online and find the "cure for cancer." I think it's very important to keep Rosalind's guidelines in mind and also to remember that the amount of information one person needs is not the same as the next person. Even if you're married to her.

On Wednesday, February 21, 2007, our Ask-the-Expert Online Conference was called Partners, Loved Ones, Caregivers: Taking Care of You. Author Marc Silver and moderator Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. answered your questions about how you can take care of your loved one and yourself during and after breast cancer treatment.

The materials presented in these conferences do not necessarily reflect the views of Breastcancer.org. A qualified healthcare professional should be consulted before using any therapeutic product or regimen discussed. All readers should verify all information and data before employing any therapies described here.

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Meet the Experts

Marc Silver is the author of Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (And Yourself) Through Diagnosis, Treatment, and Beyond.

Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. is administrative supervisor for psychosocial programs at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center's Lauder Breast Center in New York City, where she leads weekly support groups for women with early and advanced breast cancer.