Home → Day-to-Day Matters → Talking to Your Family and Friends About Breast Cancer → Ask-the-Expert Conferences: Family, Friends, Relationships → February 2007: Partners, Loved Ones, Caregivers: Taking Care of You → Tell mom she doesn't need to be "super"?

Tell mom she doesn't need to be "super"?

Page last modified on: October 16, 2008

Question from bratgelina: My mom is still trying to be Super Mom while she's getting treatment and it wears her out. How can I tell her we don't care if the place is Martha Stewart clean, as long as she's okay?: Answer —Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W.: During treatment, many patients need to behave like Super Mom. It reassures them that they're well. Most often, they're not doing it for the family, but doing it for themselves. As treatment wears on and accumulates, and they feel more and more fatigued, all of this will stop and they will give the family an opportunity to help. But this is a person who has a strong need to feel well and capable. And it's best that the family does not interfere with this.

On Wednesday, February 21, 2007, our Ask-the-Expert Online Conference was called Partners, Loved Ones, Caregivers: Taking Care of You. Author Marc Silver and moderator Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. answered your questions about how you can take care of your loved one and yourself during and after breast cancer treatment.

The materials presented in these conferences do not necessarily reflect the views of breastcancer.org. A qualified healthcare professional should be consulted before using any therapeutic product or regimen discussed. All readers should verify all information and data before employing any therapies described here.

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Meet the Experts

Marc Silver is the author of Breast Cancer Husband: How to Help Your Wife (And Yourself) Through Diagnosis, Treatment, and Beyond.

Rosalind Kleban, L.C.S.W. is administrative supervisor for psychosocial programs at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center's Lauder Breast Center in New York City, where she leads weekly support groups for women with early and advanced breast cancer.