- Question from Michelle: I have recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. I have to go back to the surgeon next week and want to take my partner with me, but am afraid that my doctors' attitude towards me will change if they know I am gay.
- Answers —Lisa Weissmann, M.D.: If your doctor's attitude changes because you're gay, find another doctor. You need to feel comfortable with the person who's about to take care of your body, and if you have the ability or the option of choosing your physician (which not all of us have the luxury of doing), I urge you to take or include your partner with you. You may be pleasantly surprised that your physician is more open than you might otherwise think, but even if you're disappointed in their response, it will give you information you need about who you want to be part of your team taking care of you. So as much as is possible, absolutely include your partner and see if your physician will live up to the expectations that you should require.
- Marisa Weiss, M.D., president and founder: When you bring your partner for the first time, if you feel very uncomfortable and nervous, your doctor may sense this and feel unsure of how to relate to you. You may assume your doctor knows that the person with you is your partner. But two things can happen here. One is that your doctor may have no idea who this person is unless you communicate that. Also, if your doctor feels uncomfortable because you feel uncomfortable, it may not be hostility but rather just simple social discomfort. Here's where clear communication can make a big difference. It would be a shame if these important things were misinterpreted and you lost confidence in your doctor unnecessarily.
- Cheryl Pearson-Fields, M.P.H.: If your doctor does not rise to the occasion after clear communication, if it is at all possible take advantage of referral networks for gay and lesbian friendly health care providers. These can be available from the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association or from a gay and lesbian community center or lesbian cancer project, should you be lucky enough to have either one in your community. Also take advantage of word of mouth. Talk to other lesbians about providers that they have found to be sensitive. Unfortunately, in our society with managed care, it's becoming more and more difficult to find lesbian-friendly health care providers or to access the ones that do exist because you're restricted to a certain number of providers, but if you can, those referrals are there, and it can make your health care experience less threatening.
On Wednesday, November 21, 2001, our Ask-the-Expert Online Conference was called Lesbians and Breast Cancer. Lisa Weissmann, M.D., Cheryl Pearson-Fields, M.P.H., and Marisa Weiss, M.D. answered your questions about being gay and having breast cancer.
The materials presented in these conferences do not necessarily reflect the views of breastcancer.org. A qualified healthcare professional should be consulted before using any therapeutic product or regimen discussed. All readers should verify all information and data before employing any therapies described here.
A production of LiveWorld, Inc.
Copyright 2008. All rights reserved.
Lisa Weissmann, M.D. is an attending physician at Mount Auburn Hospital in Cambridge, Massachusetts, dedicated to breast cancer care, with an appointment at Harvard Medical School.
Marisa Weiss, M.D. is a radiation oncologist specializing in breast cancer and the founder, president, and guiding force behind Breastcancer.org.
