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Self-conscious with new partners?

Page last modified on: August 29, 2008
Question from Jessie: I have only just accepted my sexuality. I have not had many relationships and now have to face this. I have had a partial mastectomy and feel very self-conscious about how I look. What are new partners going to think when they see me?
Answers —Cheryl Pearson-Fields, M.P.H.: I think it's important to be honest up front, and not to have this discussion in the bedroom.
Marisa Weiss, M.D., president and founder: The best sex and intimacy occurs within the context of a good relationship, so the best place I think to start is working on and enjoying the building of a relationship together, so that when the right time comes to get to know each other on a more physical level, you will have a greater chance of acceptance and excitement and confidence in what's possible with this new person in your life.
Lisa Weissmann, M.D.: As we start new relationships with anybody, one of the challenges (and also one of the joys) is getting to know the other person, with all the history and baggages and events that have made the person who it is that you're falling in love with. If this is a relationship that you hope to make more serious, then developing a trusting open line of communication should help ease your concerns and your fears as you approach physical intimacy.

On Wednesday, November 21, 2001, our Ask-the-Expert Online Conference was called Lesbians and Breast Cancer. Lisa Weissmann, M.D., Cheryl Pearson-Fields, M.P.H., and Marisa Weiss, M.D. answered your questions about being gay and having breast cancer.

The materials presented in these conferences do not necessarily reflect the views of breastcancer.org. A qualified healthcare professional should be consulted before using any therapeutic product or regimen discussed. All readers should verify all information and data before employing any therapies described here.

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Meet the Experts

Lisa Weissmann, M.D.Lisa Weissmann, M.D. is an attending physician at Mount Auburn Hospital in Cambridge, Massachusetts, dedicated to breast cancer care, with an appointment at Harvard Medical School.

Cheryl Pearson-Fields, M.P.H. is a director of health education and research with the Mautner Project for Lesbians with Cancer.

Marisa Weiss, M.D. is a radiation oncologist specializing in breast cancer and the founder, president, and guiding force behind Breastcancer.org.

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