VL22's Story: Focusing on Today No Matter What the Prognosis

I was diagnosed with two tumors on my birthday 5/5/17 - both ER+/HER2-. Terrified. Surgery scheduled, then postponed due to MRI results that required a bone scan. Surgery 6/15. It was horrible and I didn't think it could get worse.

Pathology came back — re-excision needed, scheduled for 7/3. Okay. "Oh, and we found a third tumor hiding behind one of the others. Oh - and it's TN. Oh and an intramammary node has a speck of cancer in it." "Complicated" pathology but not "bad news." Really??

I managed to not break down until we got home and not in front of the kids. I looked back at my initial diagnosis and wondered what I was so scared about, because obviously this was a death sentence! I was worried about rads for 5 weeks? Now I was staring at 5 months of hair depleting chemo! I was a wreck. How could anything work out for me if everything was going so wrong?

Well, I just finished my second AC. I cry rarely. I'm still eating well and exercising. I'm focused on enjoying every day. I don't take anything for granted. I'm nicer to those I love and those nice to me, but I'm faster to not take any crap. This is my life right now and I'm living it. It's great to be alive and I appreciate it. It breaks my heart that so many are dealing with this, which is why I come here — to support and be supported.

Finally, TNBC has a "poorer" prognosis, but not a "poor" one, which I'm so tired of reading. I feel confident I'll beat it — how else can I feel? I can't deal with tomorrow until it comes, so I focus on today.

The opinions expressed in this article are the author's own and do not necessarily represent those of Breastcancer.org nor are they intended as a substitute for the medical advice of physicians.