Suzi's Story: How a Positive Mindset Got Me Through

The dreaded word in the whole of human existence – CANCER – for me emanated at the time when I needed a blessing, not more distress. Shocked, devastated, overwhelmed – some of the many emotions rollercoasting in my mind with this unexpected diagnosis. The winning question: Why me? Why at this moment? Pondering the answers, I realized that would make me the strongest I have ever been.

At the end of April 2024, while self-checking, I found a painful sore lump in my left breast at the 6 o'clock position. As ill-informed as I am, I was not too frazzled about it – all my life I have been told “painful lumps are not cancerous."

With the advice of a dear friends and doctors, the extensive testing began — mammogram, breast scan and guided biopsy. Anxious to get it all over with, I braced myself for the discomfort and performed all tests on the same day. The merry words of my doctor kept ringing in my ears: “Only 1 out of 10 painful lumps is a cancer.” It kept me at peace until the test results appeared on my phone a week later — Friday morning on my way to work, to be precise. Hoping against hope that I am not the unfortunate one, I cheerfully opened the test results. My world was spinning out of control! OMG! Carcinoma! I am that 1 out of 10 with the painful lump! Me talking to myself: “Get it off your mind Suzi – you got work to do today,” “Keep a straight face. Stay strong!!” I pulled through until the end of the day. How do I break the devastating news to my mum and my sons? Such turmoil in my heart!

A million tears flowed from my mum and my aunt (my strongest supporters in this unnerving journey). "Devastation" was putting in lightly to how we all felt that night. I woke up with puffy eyes and a thundering headache knowing that this day is the day I have to break the news to my two sweet grown up sons. "How do I shelter them from this pain?" Questioning God at this moment: "Why oh why are you giving me so much pain and trials? Don’t you know we have faced so much heartache already?" Reality check – we should not question God – it is His will not ours. Besides, this is when I remembered, “God gives his toughest battles to the toughest soldiers.”

Elder son: Overseas at the time, on a video call surrounded by family. Younger son surrounded by his loving cousins and his friends and the family, wondering what is so important that I have to break it to the two of them at once — how do I look them in the eye and tell them? Taking the courage that God has always instilled in me I blurted out “Ma is diagnosed with breast cancer.” I heard the deafening howl and the desperate cry of my eldest piercing my heart like a dagger. No talk from my youngest – just two tears streaming down his face. “How much will it take to cure you ma?” That’s when I realized this is the blessing God has given my sons – a reason to live. I knew I had to fight this and come up triumphant! My battle is not alone – so many vouching for me to win!

I am blessed with the best hospital, oncology team and the best workplace with a supportive boss and staff. Just over a month after diagnosis I went through a lumpectomy, followed by regular check ups and testing. Then came the dreaded chemo (12 sessions, weekly). Horrible experience of seeing close friends go through the gruesome chemo regime gave me the mindset to defy the side effects as best I could. I took it upon myself to eat a healthy diet, keep a positive mindset, and to continue working without letting the chemo overrule my cancer-riddled body. Many are inspired to note that I pulled through chemo with minimum side effects with absolutely no nausea and vomiting plus no significant drop in the blood counts.

Then came the 18 sessions of radiation. Tough times, but like the win with chemo I kept going with a positive mindset and came out triumphant.

Currently, major treatment done. Following up with the Herceptin treatment every 3 weeks which will continue until Sep 2025. I am not given the all clear of NED (No Evidence of Disease) just as yet. However, I do not call myself a cancer patient anymore. I know I have beat this dreaded disease and will be given an all clear soon. The most important lesson I’ve learned through this tough journey is that tomorrow is not guaranteed. Live today as if there is no tomorrow. I'm enjoying my life to the maximum.

Blessings to all those battling the big ‘C’.